Jessica's Blog

I see so often forwarded e-mails with kitchie ideas on things you can do to prepare to have a baby.

there's one that says to take a heard of goats to a grocery store and attempt to get all items on the list while herding the goats about, without the goats eating unpurchased items or tearing down displays.

I think the same e-mail said to scatter legos all over the floor in your house and then set an alarm in the middle of the night (mimicking a baby cry) and run across a floor, impaling yourself on said legos and suffering in utter silence lest you wake another one of your children.  I dunno know, I think it more fitting to wake up in the middle of the night and try to turn off some annoying Vtech toy that has no volume control and just went off because the cat stepped on it!  The gift of course, is from one of your kids grandparents...

I laugh at these and such... but just to get a bit sanctimonious..... To really prepare for parenthood there are some VERY different things you need to do!

1) You need to prepare yourself to love some one so much it feels like your heart is breaking when that person is hurt or sad or sick.  Nothing airy or fairy about this suggestion.

2)  You need to prepare yourself to love someone so much you are willing to get out of bed multiple times every night to sooth, nurse, change,  and mop up no matter how tired you are or how much you could use the sleep.

3) You need to be secure in your love of your partner so that you know when you wake up smelling like vomit, covered in dried soured milk and sagging around the belly, he still tells you you are the most beautiful thing he's ever seen... and you know he means it... and you know that this is true partnership.

4)  You need to be prepared to see all of your best and worst characteristics played out in miniature and in parody... on  daily basis.... and be able to help yourself be a better person for it.

5)  cut the fowl mouth and road rage.... it just doesn't go well with the wee ones.  I say that as the mom of a son who bumps his trike and hollers "GODDAMMIT!!!" ;-)

There are other such things about parenthood that are all encompassing and submerging and overpowering and beautiful. 

I'm thinking of my great friend Hillary as she prepares for this journey.  She's going to be such a great mom.  For so many many many reasons, but I think one of the best reasons is that she already gets that this is going to be so much bigger than she imagined and that she won't be able to control it, and is only along for the ride..... she is sooo ahead of most in knowing this.  Hillary, if you read this, you knwo I'm rooting for you and will send you my kids' pediatrician info soon!  ha ha ha!