Jessica's Blog

Hubby took two days off of work added to this luscious three day weekend.  It has been beyond words wonderful to be all together for a few days.  I feel more rested, more together.  It's no small thing to get so much time.  I think the last time was the holidays.  Fuck that sucks.

We took a two day trip to Sacramento to visit family, do Old Sacramento, train museum and State Fair.  The kids barely napped and slept well in the hotel at night.  Hubby and I slept great too... exhaustion is good for that! ha!  I felt like we stepped into another good understanding of parenthood.  More "Go with the Flow" and a lot less trying to get them to sleep.  In other words.. forget about "our time" in the evening because in the end.. we all end up going to sleep at the same time, and waking up at the same time.

Saturday we had a little date time together.... we NEED MORE of that!  I had a margarita (or two) because it had been sooo long, and it tasted sooo good... and found that *by GOD* am I a cheap date and that I don't need to do that again.  While I liked the flavor, I DID NOT like the feeling.  My how that has changed since before kids.

I feel like we got such a great taste of vacation.  The kids are a bit bigger and closer to the same schedule, we had busy and fun days with lots of laughs and not too many tantrums.  A sense of adventure has returned somewhat.

I really want to get away without the kids.  If just for a night and a day.  I want to remember what it is like to sleep in with my husband.  Heck, to just sleep through a night, wake up on our own, get up and dressed, not even sleeping in.  We wouldn't know what to do with ourselves.  It will all come soon enough.  Soon we'll wake up to kids eating breakfast and watching tv... or even we'll wake before our big kids wondering when they'll wake up, knowing we shouldn't bother trying to get them up until after noon.  But right now I want us to have a night and morning off.  For the sake of marital preservation.  We had a talk tonight about missing each other.  In a way.... about how much longer we have to be prepared to continue missing each other.  Basically until the kids start sleeping comfortably in the same room together.

This isn't romantic "oh whoa is me" stuff.  I'm serious.  It is  serious business to consider this aspect of parenthood that does not get enough support, but LOTS of advice books: preserving the marriage around the kids.  Unconditional support and love in spite of both of us being "so done" with being tired.  We're strong with each other, this weekend was so nice and good to get perspective on how hard we work both on and off vacation.  With each month we learn more about what to expect from extended family, from ourselves.

Now to bed to prepare for the week!